Wake up call

Fascinated with the word "sensuous"! 
Sonya's Garden, Alfonso, Cavite

I dreamt of Luke last night.  Set in a  familiar mall hallway  while patiently waiting for a few former co-workers to arrive, Luke suddenly appeared in his usual work clothes seemingly sporting a rounder stomach. The growing roundness was my alarming concern prior to his early departure.  In fact, Christmas gifts for Luke had deliberately transformed into unsalted crackers to simply make my point.  I  fed him loads of noodles when I still lived in the city.  I ceased the feeding but he didn't. 

Luke's bag of Shing-A-Ling from Rowena's Tarts. 

In my dream, I shared the same sad and pissed emotions while awake.  And when Luke appeared, a happy yet disgruntled screaming LUKE!!! was all I said.  I remember having stomped my right foot too, a typical act I do when  teased by Luke.  Though I was aware enough even in my dream that he now lives in an entirely different spectrum, I surprisingly ignored. But being the  Luke that he was, he replied with his usual mocking "HE-HE-HE, Tri-kikay!", then walked away.  Yes, he often called me by that name.  He had sabotaged my name by capping it off with a slang word that best describes what a "girly-girl" is all about.   Luke passed away on the day I was en route to Baguio for J. Bond's Globe Cordillera Challenge. He was 43.  We have been friends for close to two decades.

Patti's celebration at Conways

Last Sunday, we celebrated Patti's end of a decade and toasted to a life that begins at "40".  We had fun, but there's no denying of having missed Luke during such special moment.  I'm sure he would have loved to be there and be part of the celebration.  Tears flowed for a short while, but life and the party just had to move on. 

Patti and Luke.  All about F.O.O.D.

In some way, situations happen for a reason. I said the exact same line in a previous post that talked about celebrating 93.  Despite the denial, Luke's departure had somehow triggered me and my friends to review, realize and desensitize our life's routine from the unnecessary.  A friend focuses on stress from work, the other aims for a healthier life, while the other regard friendship more than ever.  Little things, yet significant. I, on the other hand, target to embrace the undeniable concept of age and ageing.

Christmas 2011, Our last hang-out with Luke.  A July 20, 2012 dinner is set and surely Luke will be missed.

I turn on a blind eye when faced with the topic of ageing.  I fear turning 40 as much as I feared 18, 20, and 30.  Shallow yet I am amazed on how a number can define boggling thoughts which then translate into fear.  I am pretty sure that you have thought of age and ageing at some point in your life too.    But in reality, there is nothing to fear and that neither single or double digit number are in no way applicable to defining life. Luke's departure  made me realize that.

Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf

When Luke passed away, I thought of him as too young, in contradiction to my absurd notion of age and ageing.  Yet, he lived a good and jolly life.  I was shook from my deep slumber when that unfortunate day happened, which in reality was a wake up call for having long entertained unnecessary and useless thoughts. At this point, I constrain myself  from entertaining more, and instead look forward to living life.  I look forward to my Travel for Beads Project, to building dreams with J. Bond, to celebrating joyous moments, to exploring and discovering more.  I would have to agree that a life well-lived best defines our being, not age, not ageing. 

And I thank Luke for having led me to realize that.

Thank You

I am in Baguio.  And before I get going with my activities lined-up for the day, I'd like to take time to give thanks.

Thank you for the cool relaxing weather.  I froze last night but I did not mind.  This rarely happens anyway.

The reason why I am in Baguio, J. Bond's participation in Globe's Cordillera Challenge.  This photo was taken at 5:30 this morning.  Thank you for keeping J. Bond safe (and in one piece) despite accidents and bruises from his previous courageous acts  of conquering rocky and thorny mountain trails.

Christmas 2011, our annual get-together.  I am grieving and I am still in denial.  I thought it would come easier than expected.  But I was wrong. This morning came the realization and tears.  Thank you dear LUKE  for the left and right shoulders I have once cried on (which you have never ceased to tease me about), for being an obedient driver on days I needed a ride, for spending time with me and the rest of the gang in the south whereas you live in the north, for the plenty treats and the money loaned when Market Market was launched (which took years for Patti and I to repay.  Lol!  I know this drove you crazy.), for being my beck and call Kuya (older brother), and for the many many years of true friendship.  I will miss you!  Rest well... Lukey (in yellow).



25-plus years friends

This lunch, I'm scheduled for a bit of catching up with a few college friends.  A year long of living our own day-to-day usual grind, isn't it just wonderful how Christmas can bring everyone together even just for a day.  I'm looking forward.

And boy did I enjoy yesterday's threesome celebration of friendship. 25-plus years, and still going...

Like in the past,  I surrounded them with beads :)



BAZAAR 2011 Photos

ERGO, bazaars could take a toll on health.   Here's why...Too much sales talk=Sore Throat. Heat and Rain combined=Fever.  Now,  I'm down with a flu.  Aging, I think, is a culprit too.  This had not happened in the past. So, there you go.

Nevertheless, I enjoyed.  Here are a few highlights.

By Beaded Story's display.

(Super) Early morning set-up.  Focus and full attention required when fixing bead works.  

A few bead necklaces up close.

TALA & HANDPAINTED FLORA

TALA with bead accent

MOTHER'S HEART

Purple BEAD CLOTH necklace

TALA on LASO

I had a  few non-bead goods too.

TAMBOURINE NECKLACES and CERAMIC DECOR

EARRINGS for kids

MESSAGE BRACELETS.  I talked about the bracelets here.

FLAMENCO SHAWLS scattered around

Friends who came over. They were my gunshot deals. Thanks guys!

Since high school

New-found friends

At my beck and call friend, B=RAVE DUDE FRIEND. 

Everybody's "BFF", young and old

Bugsy's FANS

J. Bond's newly discovered sideline, Bantay Bata (my friend's 2 out of 4 kids)...

...and, Bantay Aso (Bugsy and "Bernard")

To a few other friends, a Timezone co-worker and a boss with her not-so-little girls anymore, apologies for missing out on the photo shoot. Those were hectic moments, but I truly appreciate your interesting news. Even amidst the hectic-ness, I was  100% all ears.

To  those who came, patronized, or simply followed By Beaded Story's bazaar-hop this year once again, here's a huge warm Thank You!!! The hop has ended, but should you wish to order any of our collections, post your message on facebook or send your email to  bybeadedstory@gmail.com.

An advance Cheery Christmas to you and your loved ones!

                                                                                           TRIX

Birthday thoughts

My day happened five days back.  No big bang fireworks.  No fancy dining experience. Instead, a simple celebration happened here.

Binondo

To die for

Yet, prior to any celebration, it has long been my ritual to recap  and reflect all that had transpired over the past year.  It is in  this way I culminate the old year with gratitude for the blessings I have received, extend my sincerest acknowledgement for the learnings from bitter mistakes, then move on to the next with new dreams guided by brighter inspirations.

With obvious lack of commitment to continually grow my best list, I am grateful for having been blessed over the past year with great health (as claimed by my endocrinologist)...

a blissful marriage (spicy at times)...

great support from family (even with bouts of MIS"es"--MISunderstanding, MIScommunication)

long-time friends (thru thick n' thin)

a multi-personality staff (who stands firm and strong in highs and lows)

and of course, the effervescent love affair I have with beads.

In my deliberate move for a long time to remain in silence out of shyness, I opt to share with you how grateful I am for these bests this time.   Life has its own way of taking its course despite the multiple attempts to do otherwise, but I have learned that all are left with no sense and misguided direction without these bests.   Yet, as grateful as I am over all these, I give much thought as well  on the what ifs, what abouts, whys, and how comes.

In this case, I speak of GIVING. 

What is it in giving that a few others are sparked to ask for more?  When given, demands are born and dissatisfaction is raised.  Not a simple thank you is said.  And when denied, nothing is to be expected except for a tounge that could lash one's heart.  

On the day of my birthday, I faced these.

The FIRST happened while at the height of the Pharmacy's medical mission.  Like in previous months, we extended our usual care to those in need of medical assistance and lifetime maintenance by providing free medical check-up and few medicine samples.  Specific to this medical mission,  we took things a notch higher.  Homemade snacks composed of   ham and cheese sandwich and a cup of coffee were provided to all patients as well.  A handful were sincerely delighted and had extended their gratitude.  However, majority spoke otherwise ... "Ay, gusto ko ng tea!".... "Wala bang gatas?".... "Bakit ham sandwich? Sana may iba pa!". Instantly, I thought, "Never again! What's with the demand considering all these are given for free!". 

SECOND and THIRD revolved around financial concerns.  First call came early morning, and the next came  late at night.  Both wishes granted.  Yet, I cannot deny myself of that  wish for a birthday greeting while both calls went on.  No one to blame.  I kept my day hush.  Facebook broke the secret.

Similar situations had crossed my path in the past. But lately, I find myself preoccupied with this matter even more.  I could have bluntly put the blame on aging as  main culprit of pinching the most sensitive points of my nerves.  Yet, I was taught and consistently reminded of  the act and benefit  of giving  since childhood. As the saying goes, Give and you shall Receive.   And as what Mom and J. Bond's Mom tirelessly impart, Give and it shall return Tenfold.

The truth is, giving can hurt.

Giving hurts when expectations are set.  No thank yous, just harsh words. It hurts when unsatisfied whims take on the lead.  Immediate financial assistance in exchange for greetings. It hurts when desires lie on bigger returns. An investment anticipated to gain back a huge heap of load in time. Instead, what is gained is loss.

I began writing this post 5 days ago with no clue on how to begin, how to go, more so how to end. All I felt was a strong urge  to ramble on such matter. But as days went by and as my writing of this post had  slowly progressed, I see things clearly now.  

Whims, harsh words and unfulfilled expectations have long  been part of  giving. It will always be.  However, none should matter, nor be bothersome,  as long as the way of giving remains  true and sincere. It is this that I wish for this coming year...The heart of giving. Give without hesitation, without expectation, without  anticipation for gains and returns.   

But returns do happen by the way.  Without knowing and through this post,  I came to realize that  I have long been blessed with  beautiful and heartwarming bests...definitely way beyond a tenfold return.  So I leave it at that and continue on :) 

          

 Trixie ...

Dumbstruck by Nestle's TV ad

I love listening to love stories of family and friends rather than watching fictional characters make love happen. A practice influenced by my first boss who started off weekly staff meetings with an update on matters of the heart. 

I carried on this practice and continue to embrace the thrill, especially during meetings with the Pharmacy staff.  There are times when I drown in tears and end with a reflective mood.   Both heartwarming and heartbreaking love stories affect me the same way. 

When I first came across Nestle's TV commercial, I was left dumbstruck. What came to mind was that drizzling afternoon ten years ago when right just then I knew.  Five years after, J. Bond and I vowed, said I DO, and began living our dream.  Together.

Now on our 5th year, we continue to thrive  on spending our days in the most meaningful way as a couple and as an individual.  I'd like to think that nothing drastic has changed since that fateful afternoon.  Though we have stumbled upon quirks and shortcomings, these are what I tell J. Bond I call "spice".  At times we need a kick, and only spice can make such thing happen. Besides, bland equates to boredom. And, the happy and good moments are what truly matter most.

At this point, it still is hazy as to where our journey will lead despite the presence of a plan. But I am comforted by the fact that I have been blessed with a "double O 7" who folds at my quirks and yet lifts me up at my worst.  A huge chunk of gratitude I owe to my dear friends, B=RAVE Dude Friend and NY-based Pinky, who held me captive on the eve of my wedding. Because of them, I have come to realize that there is no other way of living life than the way life is lived now.

from left to right: J. Bond's bro and wife, B=RAVE DUDE friend and Pinky, US

By the way, I find Kitchie Nadal's version of Apo Hiking's song, Pag-ibig, spicier :)

Out and About since Wednesday

Funny that my NY-based BFF, Pinky,  posts a congratulatory  note on Facebook for my new choice of quick getaway instead of the usual Tagaytay. *Haha.  I say funny because what she doesn't know was I was exactly where she expects me to be the day after I returned from Baguio....

...Saturday lunch with the fam at Bawais ... in TAGAYTAY!

Dark photo, but proof.



Tagaytay obviously remains on the top spot of my list.  And in a couple of days, I'll be hanging around my usual spot once again.  This time beads related. 

Come to think of it, I have been out and about since Wednesday last week.  On top of Baguio and Tagaytay, I've been running all around...

The Pharmacy's participation in Molino 2's basketball league parade on Sunday, at 6:00AM! So, I was practically on the phone most of the day planning out my little entourage while at Baguio.

Then, ran off to Baby Gia's christening in the afternoon.  For the very first time, I volunteered to be a fairy Godmother.  Must be her chubby cheeks!  Just like her Kuyas' cheeks =)

Immersed myself in a cemetery near the Pharmacy on Monday morning.   I was surprised to see lots of early morning exercisers stretching, brisk walking and jogging around the cemetery.  A few even played Volleyball and Badminton.  There are no decent parks nearby, so  this cemetery stands in as a good alternative despite the presence of the "dead". *Haha.  I was there by the way only to observe and plan for the Pharmacy's next activity promoting good health.

And with that, we kicked off our early morning exercise on Tuesday morning with the Senior Citizens of Molino 5...



...followed by a free medical check-up.

That's it (as of this post).  Catching my breath now :)